Jesus of Nazareth . . . was a prophet,
powerful in word and deed before God and all the people.
Luke 24:19

I have brought the Gentiles to God
by my message and by the way I lived before them.
Romans 15:18

Jesus was powerful in His words and His deeds.

In Romans Paul acknowledges his success in leading others to Christ came from not only his words, but the life he lived.

Never forget that our own attitudes and actions influence our children more deeply than our words.

Children Learn What They Live
by Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D.

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.
If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.
If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.
If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.
If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.
If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.
If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.
If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.
If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.
If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.
If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.
If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.
If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.
If children live with fairness, they learn justice.
If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.
If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.
If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.

This poem hung on my wall when my children were young as a reminder that someone was always watching my deeds, even if they were not listening to my words.

(Check out the book, Children Learn What They Live.   In it the author expounds on each of the qualities mentioned in her 1954 poem.)

1 Samuel 1:21-23

Now the man Elkanah and all his house went up to offer to the Lord the yearly sacrifice and his vow. But Hannah did not go up, for she said to her husband, “Not until the child is weaned; then I will take him, that he may appear before the Lord and remain there forever.” And Elkanah her husband said to her, “Do what seems best to you; wait until you have weaned him. Only let the Lord establish His word.” So the woman stayed and nursed her son until she had weaned him.

Hannah knew the answer to the question.  In those days children were not weaned for 3 to 5 years. Wean means to ‘fully deal with’.  Hannah wouldn’t leave Samuel during those years, even to go to the temple, as she was aware of the time it would take to ‘fully deal’ with Samuel if she wanted him to ‘appear before the Lord and remain there forever’.

The preschool years are foundational:

• 2/3 of everything a child will ever learn, he learns before 1^st grade
• 85% of his personality and attitude toward life is formed in the first 5 years
• He begins even from the womb to be sensitive to spirit, mood, & attitudes
• Self-will must be broken by 2; it is very difficult to break later
• Needs to learn to trust by 18 months or it will be hard for him to trust as adult
• 12 attitudes he needs to develop during this stage of his life:
  Attentiveness
  obedience
  contentment
  neatness
  reverence
  forgiveness
  gratefulness
  faith
  truthfulness
  security
  meekness
  cautiousness

Wow – that is a lot to deal with!  But Elkanah gave the way to cover it all. He said to let the Lord establish His Word. Hannah was to spend the preschool years seeing that God’s Word was established in Samuel. Such is our example to follow.

Always remember that there is nothing you encounter as a parent that can not be positively affected by prayer and God’s Word – and especially praying God’s Word.

Examples:

In the breaking of the self-will pray and help your children begin to memorize these verses (‘I will’ scriptures will help their will to become His will):
Psalm 119:15  I will study your commandments,
Psalm 101:2  I will behave wisely in a perfect way.
Psalm 101:2  I will walk within my house with a perfect heart.
Psalm 119:16  I will delight in your principles and not forget your word.
Psalm 101:3  I will set nothing wicked before my eyes;
Psalm 56:3  What time I am afraid, I will trust in God.

When teaching your children to trust remember:
Romans 10:17  Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God 
Help him find his security in God through His Word.

When your child is struggling with sharing, let him see you share and as you do, say that God says in the Bible:
1 Tim 6:18 Be ready to share

Don’t wait to start training your little one in the way he should go.  I encourage you to stay in the Word and look for ways to teach the Word as you go no matter what the age of your child:
Deuteronomy 6:6-9  And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are away on a journey, when you are lying down and when you are getting up again.  Tie them to your hands as a reminder, and wear them on your forehead.  Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.

Romans 11:16 (Msg)
Behind and underneath all this there is a holy, God-planted, God-tended root. If the primary root of the tree is holy, there’s bound to be some holy fruit.

What we eat affects our future children.

We are well aware that we affect our children through our DNA  in their physical characteristics such as color of hair and eyes, but did you know that the way we eat before our children are conceived will affect their health?  Dr. John Christopher in his book, Herbal Home Health Care states “The time we start preparing for an anti-disease susceptibility is many months before conception. If, however, that is too late and the child is here and sick at this time, we will have to work on the present cause, but this effort could be eliminated if we had started a few generations back.”

For more on this check out this article that points out what we do to our bodies can somehow leave an imprint on our genetic material and be passed along to the next generation.

How we live our lives affects our future children.

It’s interesting that what has been discovered in the scientific realm of how choices made nutritionally affect future generations is also what God has said in His Word concerning how we relate to Him.  Deuteronomy 5:9 You shall not bow down to them nor serve them. For I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children to the third and fourth generations of those who hate Me,

Catherine Marshall speaks about this in her book, Something More. She writes, ” just as we can inherit either a fortune or debts, so in the spiritual realm we can inherit either spiritual blessings or those liabilities (unabashedly called ‘sins’ in scripture) that hinder our development into mature persons.”

Chuck Swindoll in his book, You and Your Child refers to this as “grandad’s bent” and points out that the bents in our lives toward particular sins must be broken for the good of the children that will come after us. Deuteronomy 5:29 “O that there were such an heart in them, that they would fear me, and keep all my commandments always, that it might be will with them, and with their children for ever!

Since the nutritional and spiritual choices made will directly affect the children that are yet conceived, then each choice should be carefully thought through, if not for your own good, but for the good of your future children.  Live life as a ‘God-planted, God-tended root which will result in some holy (pure, virtuous) fruit.’

Children learn best when they hear and see what is being taught.  Read the Bible story ahead of time and be ready to tell it in your own words with much enthusiasm, acting it out as much as possible.  Use visuals to illustrate the Bible story.  Then try to end with a practical application for their lives and a verse to memorize.  A song is always good to help remember the teaching as well; put the verse or something in the story to a familiar tune.

Here’s a suggestion for telling 1 Samuel 16:1-13, the story of the shepherd boy David being anointed as king.

Story:

Tell about Samuel looking for a new king as you walk around searching & looking at each child.  Before you start telling the story, give one child a stuffed lamb.  When you come to that child say that David was just a kind, young boy watching sheep when Samuel found him.

Samuel had looked at all of David’s older brothers who were much stronger, but God told Samuel that the Lord doesn’t make decisions the way people do by outward appearance; the Lord looks at a person’s thoughts and intentions.

God helped Samuel know that David was the chosen king, not because of what he looked like on the outside, but because of what he was like on the inside.  Samuel then anointed David with oil.  Anointing with oil was a way of showing that a person was set apart to be used by God.

Visual: Ahead of time, draw David on the front of a piece of construction paper.  Then draw the crown and scenery if you like on the back (hold paper to light to make sure you draw the crown in the right place).  Tape David to a plate (don’t show the back of paper)  Anoint David with oil using a cotton ball to apply oil.  The crown magically appears when the paper is covered in oil. Say that God saw more than what Samuel saw when he looked at David; God saw that David had a good heart to be the new king.

Practical application: David was chosen and anointed to be king because he had a good heart.  Emphasis that our actions are more important than our appearance.  God has something special for each of us to do just as He had for David to do.  We must keep our hearts kind and good so we can do what God wants us to do.

Memory verse: 1 Samuel 16:7 … man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.

I have treasured the words of His mouth
More than my necessary food.
Job 23:12

In Matthew 6:1-18 Jesus talked of three duties of every Christian.  He gave instructions for giving, praying, and fasting.  In each case He said ‘when’ you give, ‘when’ you pray, ‘when you fast’ indicating these were duties not options.  I must confess that I taught my children to give and to pray, but never realized fasting was not just an option.

Fasting is a vital practice for every Christian. The discipline of fasting breaks you out of the world’s routine and causes your relationship with Jesus to go deeper.  And we should teach our children that we can give up a favorite food or activity from time to time to show God our love for Him. There are many Bible stories you can tell them of people fasting.  The most familiar is the story of Jesus fasting and the devil tempting Him. Here’s a fun video illustrating the story.

The following is an excellent video that explains fasting to children.

We as parents can set the example of disciplining our bodies as recorded in 1 Corinthians 9:27.  Ezra called the parents to a fast for their littles ones in Ezra 8:21-23.  We can powerfully affect our children by praying and fasting for them.

For a thorough explanation of fasting read Fasting: Opening the door to a deeper, more intimate, more powerful relationship with God by Jentzen Franklin.

Psalm 34:17
The Lord hears his people when they call to him for help.
He rescues them from all their troubles.

Psalm 131:2
But I have stilled and quieted myself,
just as a small child is quiet with its mother.
Yes, like a small child is my soul within me.

Psalm 94:19
When I was upset and beside myself,
you calmed me down and cheered me up.

Col. 3:15-17
And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts.
For as members of one body you are all called to live in peace. And always be thankful.
Let the words of Christ, in all their richness, live in your hearts and make you wise.
Use his words to teach and counsel each other.
Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts.
And whatever you do or say, let it be as a representative of the Lord Jesus,
all the while giving thanks through him to God the Father.

Zeph. 3:17
The Lord your God in your midst,
The Mighty One, will save;
He will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love,
He will rejoice over you with singing.”

Please read these verses, take them literal, pray them, apply them to every area of your life.  Lead your children to apply them.  There is NOTHING that you face that God can’t handle!!!!!!!  Prayer and the Word is the answer to any emotional, physical, or behavioral problem.

Please watch these disturbing videos with the above scriptures in mind.  Medicine does not trump God!  No matter what you are facing in your life or with your children, let God be the first one you call on, and trust Him wholeheartedly!  Then ‘use his words to teach and counsel each other’.

Watch the full episode. See more FRONTLINE.

Children learn —

10% of what they read

20% of what they hear

30% of  what they see

50% of what they see and hear

70% of what they say in their own words

90% of what they say while they do something

With this in mind, we should provide learning opportunities which incorporate seeing, hearing, saying, and doing.  The Here A Little, There A Little lessons on this blog are designed to teach a Bible verse using as many senses as possible.

Some interesting statistics:

Children can recall 3 hours later 70% of what we tell them, and only 10% of it 3 days later.
They can recall 3 hours later 72% of what we show them, and only 20% of it 3 days later.
Children can recall 3 hours later 85% of what we tell and show them , and 65% of it 3 days later.

Lord Jesus, make Thyself to me

A living, bright Reality;

More present to faith’s vision keen

Than any outward object seen;

More dear, more intimately nigh,

Than even the sweetest earthly tie.

In all your training of your children, whether it be manners, the skill of riding a bike, the knack of organizing, the correct way to hold a pencil, or whatever – remember the most important thing you will ever pass on to your children is the attitude and desire summed up in the above poem/prayer by Charlotte Elliot.  Pray it passionately for yourself.  Be an example of one who truly knows Jesus and depends on Him for everything, so that your child will desire to know Jesus in the same way and will one day passionately pray this for himself.

Jeremiah 9:23-24
This is what the Lord says: “Let not the wise man gloat in his wisdom, or the mighty man in his might, or the rich man in his riches. Let them boast in this alone: that they truly know me and understand that I am the Lord who is just and righteous, whose love is unfailing, and that I delight in these things. I, the Lord, have spoken!

Greet each other in Christian love.
1 Peter 5:14 (NLT)

Have you walked past someone on the street or in a store and just went on by as if no one was there?  This scripture points out we should greet everyone with love.  My Dad thought this was just plain good manners; he would never walk past a person without saying ‘Hello’ or ‘How are you?’   You never know when a simple smile and friendly greeting from you will be the encouragement a troubled person needs at that moment.

I feel we should train our children to greet others with love.  Now to a stranger that can be just a ‘hello’ accompanied with a smile.   But to friends – children and adults – it could also be a handshake or a hug. However, we have to set the example.

Make an effort to speak to those you come in contact with.  In so doing you teach your children that each person is important to God and shouldn’t be ignored by us.

“realize that all human beings are really members of  the same family and that being members of the same family they owe each other some measure of warmth and solace.” (Scrooge’s nephew in the 1938 version of A Christmas Carol)

Here’s a song adapted from “Hello” on the album Especially for Children…of all ages by Bill Gaither you might sing with your children to get them in the habit of saying ‘Hello’.

God likes things organized.  Just read in Exodus 36-40 and see the details He gives for the furnishings in the Tabernacle and the arrangement of the furniture.  As always, He is our example.  If He wants His House organized, our homes should be organized. But I’m aware that with all you have to do, the house sometimes becomes low on your list of priorities. However, getting organized will save time in the long run, and having a clutter-free home will have a calming affect on your children.

Accomplishing this comes very easy for some people, but others find it more difficult.  We can claim some of God’s promises that apply here:
Philip. 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
1 Thes. 5:24 He who calls you is faithful, who also will do it.
Ask God to help you ‘watch over carefully all that goes on throughout your household ‘(Proverbs 31:27)

Don’t beat yourself up if your gift is not organization -  but don’t be afraid to ask for help from those who do have that gift  -  it’s all part of ‘bearing one another’s burdens’(Galatians 6:2).  Some people really enjoy organizing and would be delighted to help. If that’s not you, you have different gifts that you can share. In fact, some people may tend to be so organized that they will need to learn from you how to sometimes  leave the broom and go build a memory!

Read 1 Corinthians 12 to see how the Body of Christ is to work.

The Christian Stay at Home Moms blog offers a book to help in organizing.

Involving Your Children in the Process

Deuteronomy 6 tells us to teach as we go.  You can make cleaning and organizing a teaching opportunity as you talk about how God was specific about organizing His house and we should do the same.

Give them age-appropriate jobs to do so they can feel a sense of accomplishment:
(Galatians 6:4 Let everyone be sure that he is doing his very best, for then he will have the personal satisfaction of work well done and won’t need to compare himself with someone else.) Lead them to memorize this scripture.

Be like Mary Poppins and ‘find the fun in every job to be done’.  Make a game out of cleaning – for example pretend that a bomb will go off if the job isn’t completed by a certain time;  or pretend that the president or Jesus is coming for a visit.  I like to lead children in a chant of (1 Cor. 3:9) – ‘we work together; we work together’ as we clean up.

Make a game of it:

And please don’t forget to ask for help if needed