On November 10, 2008 our oldest son, Josh, and his wife, Becca, made us grandparents for the first time.

We are so thankful for Grant William.  He is truly our miracle baby, as you know, if you have been reading Becca’s blog about her walk through infertility for two years.

Now I know that I am inexperienced at being a grandparent, but God’s word has some specific instructions to grandparents that I wanted to share.

Deut. 4:9 (NLT)
“But watch out! Be very careful never to forget what you have seen the Lord do for you. Do not let these things escape from your mind as long as you live! And be sure to pass them on to your children and grandchildren.

Timothy’s grandmother was an example of this to us.  She passed her faith on to her grandson.

2 Tim. 1:5 (NLT)
I know that you sincerely trust the Lord, for you have the faith of your mother, Eunice, and your grandmother, Lois.

Even though our children are grown, God says that we still have work to do concerning our grandchildren.  What a responsibility and a wonderful privilege!!!  What fun we are going to have helping our children teach their children about Jesus!!!!!

Psalm 71:18 (NLT)  Now that I am old and gray, do not abandon me, O God, Let me proclaim your power to this new generation your mighty miracles to all who come after me.

Patience is “waiting until later for what I want now”. God is our perfect example of this as He wants our love and affection now, but He waits patiently until we are ready to yield to Him:

And remember, the Lord is waiting so that people have time to be saved…2 Peter 3:15

Don’t you realize how kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Or don’t you care? Can’t you see how kind he has been in giving you time to turn from your sin? Romans 2:4

If God has such patience with us, we should have patience with each other:

Be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. Ephesians 4:2

As parents, our patience is tested daily and there are times when we all think we have totally lost it. This is when we need to rest in the fact that through knowing God and by His power, we can endure anything:

We also pray that you will be strengthened with his glorious power so that you will have all the patience and endurance you need…Col. 1:11

Knowing God leads to self-control. Self-control leads to patient endurance, and patient endurance leads to godliness. 2 Peter 1:6

One way our children learn patience is from observing us. They will usually respond to a situation the same way we do, so they need to see us exercising our patience in difficult situations. When we lose our patience, it can be make the situation worse; when we are patient, we have a calming effect on our children.

Howbeit for this cause I obtained mercy, that in me first Jesus Christ might show forth all longsuffering (patience), for a pattern to them which should hereafter believe on him. 1 Tim. 1:16

In addition to your modeling patience, you can have fun using creative activities to teach patience. Here are some ideas I have used through the years with my own children and with my two year old class this last month:

1. Our theme song for the month has been from a children’s musical called Music Machine (click to see this album available at Amazon.com). To hear the song about patience click here 07-have-patience1.

2. In this song Herbert the Snail sings “Have Patience”. We had fun making a snail out of clay dough and painting it after it dried. To make the clay-dough, mix 1 cup flour, 1/2 cup salt, and 1/3 cup water. Roll the dough into a snake and curl it like a snail. Use a broken toothpick for feelers.

Herbert the Snail

3. We also learned to sign the song.

4. I had the children all sit down on the carpet and wait quietly until the timer went off (about one minute or so) and then I gave them a small treat and thanked them for waiting patiently.

5. We pointed out patience in any video we watched or book we read.

6. When we read The Tortoise and the Hare, we made a turtle out of a paper plate folded in half for its shell and then added a head, legs, and tail. We talked about how the turtle walked patiently toward his goal.

7. When we read Daddy, Are We There Yet, we pretended to take a car trip and talked about waiting patiently until we arrived at our destination.

8. I thanked them anytime I observed them using patience.

9. I acted out being impatient, which really surprised them to see me act like they do sometimes when they don’t get what they want and when they want it. ( I later apologized for not being patient)

I’m sure you can come up with more creative ideas of your own. Have fun and remember that with God’s power you can “Have Patience”

What a mother-to-be eats during pregnancy feeds the child physically.  It is necessary for the baby’s normal, healthy physical development.  In the same way, what the mother takes into her spirit feeds the baby’s spirit.  Andrew Murray, in his book, How to Raise Your Children for Christ, points out that in that holy time of mystery, when mother and child are still one, and influences from a mother’s spirit pass into the child, God says that the mother is to obey all that He commands. (Judges 13:14)  God wants the mother obeying His Word and thus feeding the child’s spirit with scripture.

It is interesting that there are 9 Fruit of the Spirit listed in Galatians 5:22-23 and there are 9 months of pregnancy.  Take one Fruit each month of pregnancy to study, pray, and meditate on.  I did this with my 4 pregnancies and now I am praying with my daughter-in-law as she is praying the Fruit of the Spirit into her first child due in November (Grant William at 20 weeks pictured above).

Listed below are my notes from studying and meditating on the Fruit of the Spirit when I was pregnant.

1. Love - giving to others’ basic needs without having as my motive any personal reward

John 17:26 And I have declared to them Your name, and will declare it, that the love with which You loved Me may be in them, and I in them.”

2. Joy - the exultation of my inward being that results from genuine harmony with God and others

John 17:13 But now I come to You, and these things I speak in the world, that they may have My joy fulfilled in themselves.

3. Peace - harmony with God, others, and self

Philip. 4:7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

4. Longsuffering - patience, endurance, inward strength to withstand stress

2 Peter 3:9 The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count

slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.

5. Gentleness - expressing personal care appropriate to another’s emotional need

Titus 3:2 to speak evil of no one, to be peaceable, gentle, showing all humility to all men.

6. Goodness - righteousness, loving-kindness

Romans 11:22 Therefore consider the goodness and severity of God: on those who fell, severity; but toward you, goodness, if you continue in His goodness. Otherwise you also will be cut off.

7. Faith - visualizing what God intends to do in a given situation and acting in harmony with it

Mark 11:22 So Jesus answered and said to them, “Have faith in God.

8. Meekness - controlled, humble, yielding my personal rights and expectations to God

1 Peter 3:4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a meek and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.

9. Temperance - self control, mastering one’s desires and passions, instant obedience to the initial promptings of God’s Spirit

1 Cor. 9:27 But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.

It is never too early nor too late to begin teaching character to your children.

Steve McChesney has a great article about teaching children the character quality of respect.  It can be found at here.

I just spent a month teaching my two-year-old class about respect.  We used the word often when  correcting unacceptable behavior and we looked for examples of respect or lack of respect in any books we read.

I took Aretha Franklin’s song  “R-E-S-P-E-C-T” and changed the words (see below).  The children loved it and have really responded well to the teaching.  They have grasped the concept of respect as showing kindness and they use the term appropriately, plus they have learned to spell the word.  And they are only two years old!!

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

R-E-S-P-E-C-T spells respect it’s plain to see.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T means I’m kind to you; you’re kind to me.

Show

Respect to your mom

Respect to your dad

Respect to your friends

Respect for their things

Respect to your teachers

Respect for your school

R-E-S-P-E-C-T  This is what it means to me!! (clapping as you say this)

Anyone can smile and sing when things are going great.  The true test of my faith is to smile and sing when I am in the midst of a trial in my life.

It brings a smile to God’s heart when we express  trust in Him even when our circumstances seem contrary to what we have always believed about Him.  It encourages ourselves and others when we declare our love for God and confidence in Him during these times.  The attached song by Matt Redman sums this up.

Help your children grasp early in life the fact that no matter what comes our way, God never lets go of us!!!!

08-you-never-let-go

My mentor, Jo Bevington, sent me a letter recently.  I am sharing it with you so you can hopefully capture her  passion for establishing God’s Word in children, and you can feel the joy she possesses in her life.  Keep in mind that she is 85, never had children of her own,  has been a widow for about 40 years, and had a stroke recently which has left her unable to see very well and unable to walk without a walker.  The only thing she has expressed regret about her situation is that she just had to give up teaching her preschool Sunday School class because her walker was too much of a distraction and safety hazard for the children.

Dear Sheilah,

What joy it has been to talk to you on the telephone!

These are the preschool Bible thoughts I was telling you about.  What joy it is to me to make me a pocket verse everyday and by the end of the day I have memorized it…..So I think what fun it would be for families of preschoolers to make their child a “pocket verse” every day.  Since young children are concrete learners, the words of the Bible might become valuable to them if they carried around a little Bible thought each day.

Today was a fun day for me.  Rebecca, who cleans my house, decided she wanted to learn to play piano.  And it has been great joy for me to teach her.  We just take time out from her work and have a lesson.  I am trying to play again, even though it is very hard to see.  I can only do it a short time each time I try.  But the Lord is Good!  I can still play.

I love you, Sheilah!

Jo

Jo’s joy, in spite of her circumstances, comes from her daily contact with God through His Word.

Listed below are some of the Bible thoughts she mentioned.  If you want to see more,  please contact me.  Deuteronomy says we are to be ready to share God’s Word with our children as we go about our daily routine.  I liked Jo’s idea of putting it on a card and giving the child something tangible to hold on to all day.

God called the light ‘day’ and the darkness he called ‘night’   Genesis 1:5

God made all kinds of trees to grow.  Genesis 2:9

Love your father and mother.  Exodus 20:12

A friend loves at all times.  Proverbs 17:17

Everything God made is beautiful.  Ecclesiastes 3:11

The birds have nests.  Matthew 8:20

Help one another.  Galatians 5:13

We had the best Fourth of July ever!!! Yes, we had food; yes, we had fireworks; yes we had watermelon. We had Wii games, bocce ball in the backyard, and conversation around the fire pit. There was the usual Daws family movie quoting and the constant playing of patriotic music and movies throughout the day. There were even a few non-mother-approved displays of pyrotechnics; however, I can’t complain because everyone did sit long enough for the reading of the “Declaration” and “The Midnight Ride of Paul Revere”. But none of these alone are what made it a spectacular 4th. It’s the fact that our entire family was at our house along with some of our favorite extended family.

Nothing can compare with family enjoying each other. What a gift from God!!! It is interesting that the author of the Declaration of Independence understood the importance of family. Thomas Jefferson once said, “The happiest moments of my life have been the few which I have passed at home in the bosom of my family.” I wonder if he had any idea that one day the celebration of what he had a part in would be a family fun-filled holiday.

As my heart rejoices over the day we had, it also hurts for those who couldn’t have that for whatever reason - the recent loss of a daughter, a father near death, discord in the family, or a family member in another country actually defending the right to have a fun-filled 4th.

The first institution God established was the family. No matter what your family situation, always remember - if God so valued the family, so should we. Your family is a gift of God to you, as you are to them.

I hope you will take the time to listen to the following song by Gary Dunham A Happy Family. It was in the top 10 Christian songs in 1981 so it is a little dated, but It has been special to our family through the years. Several years ago one of our children accidentally recorded over our only copy of the song, so you will hear him at the end, but you will get the message of the song

A Happy Family

He has put a new song in my mouth– Psalm 40:3

Do you have a new song to sing each day? I have to admit that lately I have not had a song in my heart or in my mouth because of negative circumstances in our lives. But singing can bring physical, emotional, cognitive, and spiritual refreshment to individuals of all ages, even beginning in the womb. The unborn child’s ears at 20 weeks are structurally equivalent to an adult’s ears and the amniotic fluid is an excellent conductor of sound.

God knows what He’s doing when He encourages us numerous times throughout Scripture to sing. He desires our songs of praise to Him, but He also designed music for our good - to promote our wellness, to help us manage stress, to encourage us to express our feelings, to help enhance our memory, and to help us improve communication.

It is easy to sing when all is right in our world, but we should not sing only when things are going well for us. My mentor that I mentioned in a previous post, Jo Bevington, is recuperating from a stroke, is almost blind, and is now unable to work with children, but she always has a new song in her heart and mouth when I talk with her. She recently sent me this scripture: I will be glad and full of joy because of You Most High God. I will sing praise to You.” Psalm 9:2

Scriptures gives us examples of ways God used music in difficult times. In 2 Chronicles 20, God instructed the singers to lead the way as the army marched toward the enemy which lead to their ultimate victory. In 1 Samuel 16:23 David’s harp playing soothed the troubled spirit of the king.

With all this in mind, we should sing often with our children. Don’t worry if you are like me and can’t carry a tune . . . God nor your children will care. It will bless God, your children, and you. God has designed children to give Him the best praise and you as their parent get to have a part in that as you guide them to sing. (Psalm 8:2 Nursing infants gurgle choruses about you; toddlers shout the songs that drown out enemy talk, and silence atheist babble.)

Here are a few examples of songs that you can sing to familiar tunes. One mother recently wrote me that she was learning to make up songs each day with her children…what fun! Let’s all keep singing

Blow, Blow, Blow the Wind (Psalm 147:18)

(tune of Row, Row, Row Your Boat)

Blow, blow, blow the wind

Gently through the trees

God causes His wind to blow

How I like the breeze

A Helper I Will Be(1 Corinthians 3:9)

(tune of The Farmer in the Dell)

A helper I will be

A helper I will be

I will help my mommy

A helper I will be

Be Ready to Share (1 Timothy 6:18)

(tune of 3 Blind Mice)

Be ready to share

Be ready to share

It’s more fun when we share our toys

So let’s share with the girls and the boys

Be ready to share

Be ready to share

It is Better to Give Than Receive (Ephesians 4:28, 2Cor. 9:7)

(tune of Mary Had a Little Lamb)

It is better to give than receive

Give than receive

Give than receive

It is better to give than receive

Giving makes us glad

Brush Your Teeth

(tune of Row, Row Your Boat)

Brush, Brush, Brush your teeth

Brush your teeth each day

Then you’ll have a pretty smile

And healthy teeth to stay

Here is another video teaching aid using Joe. Children are concrete learners so using visuals with them is very helpful in getting a point across. You can easily adapt Joe to help you teach many things to your children.

In this video Joe learns that he is special just the way he is. Self esteem is a foundational character quality that we all need to have. We as parents need to feel good about ourselves before we can help our children learn to value their own uniqueness. God wants us all to know that He loves us just the way we are. Romans 5:8 But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.

If you can’t get the video to play, try clicking this link.

I have heard it said that the best thing a mom can do for her child is to love that child’s father. Our love and respect for our husband sets the example for our children to learn to honor their father. No one else can teach your children that concept as well as you can because no one else is going to love their father as much as you do. Ephesians. 6:2-3 says that honoring your father (and your mother) is the first commandment that comes with a promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.” It seems that the best thing we can do for our children and for their father is to exemplify honor and respect.

The Bible has something to say about how we are to treat our husbands:

Ephesians 5:33 - …each one of you must also love his own wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”

1 Peter 3:5-6 - After all, this is how holy women who had confidence in God expressed their beauty in the past. They placed themselves under their husbands’ authority as Sarah did. Sarah obeyed Abraham and spoke to him respectfully. You became Sarah’s daughters by not letting anything make you afraid to do good. (So it seems the children, the father, and the mom profit from honoring the father - it makes us more beautiful!!)

I recently read these suggestions for honoring your husband. They were written by Mary Alice Smith who was married for 67 years to Bible teacher Fred Smith:

1) Appreciate him - Never give the impression, “I could have done better.”

2) Send him off each day with a pocketful of “feel goods” Get up and fix him breakfast, compliment him on how he looks, tell him you will be glad when he comes home.

3) Believe in him - Support his motives. Let him know you believe he is sincere in what he is doing. Never tear him down or cause him to doubt himself.

4) Know what is important in his life - Don’t assume that the family is number one always, especially if he is following a calling. Let him know you and the family want to participate in his calling, and you don’t want to compete with it.

5) Be loyal to him - We have friends who always “air their dirty laundry” when we are together. When the wife exposes the husband’s weaknesses, it is usually because she is insecure.

6) Laugh when he tells a story - I try never to groan and say, “You aren’t going to tell that one again, are you?” People watch the wife when the husband is speaking.

7) Let him brag to you - It is so easy for a wife to think it’s her job to keep her husband humble, but everyone else in the world does enough of that.

8 ) Make him feel like a man - Someone once said, “Treat him like a king and he will treat you like a queen.”

9) Help him concentrate - Be careful about interrupting your husband.

10) Avoid jealousy - The “green-eyed monster” is a sure sign of insecurity and selfishness. The love in 1 Corinthians 13 certainly excludes jealousy.

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There is no higher calling for a woman than being a wife and a mother. I have always been so proud to be Mrs. Billy Daws. I am married to my best friend!! Happy Father’s Day, Billy.